A Bit Intense

19 Ramadhan, 1444

I'm not quite sure why but the early days of the fasting month saw me (if that's the appropriate verb) listening with an unwonted intensity to all sorts of music. I think this was partly to do with the fact that there wasn't much actual time to listen, so I was determined to make best use of whatever time there was, and partly because a key feature of the month is that it enhances one's gratitude for not simply food & drink but just about every good thing and I was particularly struck by just what a good thing music is.

Now it's not that the inherent goodness of music came as a sudden revelation - of course, I've always known that and, more importantly, felt that since being a little kid. But I just seemed to feel it more deeply than usual somehow.

The feeling applied to just about everything I managed to listen to, but most of all to various pieces from the Finnish master Jean Sibelius, especially the symphonies, and, most especially, the fourth. My go-to version is the one conducted by the (then) young Simon Rattle - with the City of Birmingham Symphony Orchestra - which I've got on CD. But listening around I've come to the conclusion I prefer Esa Pekka Salonen doing his stuff with it, though it's a close run thing. (The version I link to, by the way, features an obviously very young Salonen. I saw him conducting when I was in Sheffield in the 80's and, my goodness me, the young ladies in attendance, of whom there were more than a few, went absolutely gaga. And I'm not sure it was over the music, to be honest.)

On Top

18 Ramadhan, 1444

I'm deeply into Kenneth Cragg's The Event of the Qur'an, so I can declare my Islamic-themed reading for the fasting month as quite a success, even with a couple of weeks left (which should be ample time to finish Cragg's book.) Happily I've also managed to find time to keep going on the second volume of Archie Ammons's Complete Poems, helped along considerably by the fact that I'm now reading the segment dedicated to the poems published in 2005's Bosh and Flapdoodle. I loved the book when it came out, so much so that I read it too fast. I'm finding myself doing something similar now, but because my time reading has to be more carefully rationed than usual I'm slowing up enough to feel an even greater engagement with the material - which is basically Archie as an old man railing, sort of, against the dying of the light, but in a gloriously wise, funny and crusty manner. Definitely the kind of work to appeal to a crusty old chap like myself.

The funny thing is that I keep thinking of a time I'll re-read this in the single volume paperback I got hold of when it was first published. And another sort of funny thing occurs to me: it's difficult to pick out single poems from Ammons's work as standalone pieces, just as it's difficult to quote from Archie. It's the cumulative nature of the poems that impacts the reader. I just kind of bookmarked a lovely poem entitled Thoughts, from Bosh and Flapdoodle, a sort of meditation on the work and death of A. E. Houseman which was very funny, deeply moving and a little bit scary, all at the same time, but I'm pretty sure my sense of it as an individual piece somehow apart from the rest of Bosh will fade. And rightly so.

Just decided: this (Bosh and Flapdoodle) is my favourite book from Ammons, for now, at least. TOP BARD, eh?  

Dancing Days

17 Ramadhan, 1444

Thought of Mum a few times today, on the anniversary of her death. Funnily enough the most vivid memory concerned her dancing. Her determination to cut the rug on any weekend at a workingman's club was a thing to behold, Something I didn't inherit, though I'm like her in any number of other ways. Not sure that Dad could ever really keep up, which, I suspect, resulted in a fair amount of criticism raining down on him.

Can't help but wonder why dancing doesn't feature on the curriculum. Bit of a non sequitur, I know, but it's running late and I declare myself beyond mere connections.

In Company, And Alone

16 Ramadhan, 1444

Broke the fast this evening with quite a crowd at our place. Much laughter.

Thought of the Prophet (peace be upon him) alone in the watches of the night receiving the early surahs. The first chapter of Kenneth Craggs's The Event of the Qur'an evokes that perspective on Rasulullah quite brilliantly. It also features a quotation from Henry Vaughan's The Night that I'd quite forgotten: 

Dear Night! this worlds' defeat;
The stop to busy fools; care's check and curb;
The day of Spirits; my soul's calm retreat
Which none disturb...

Lovely stuff. Must put aside some time for HV soon. At his best the equal of Donne - and surpasses him in simple sincerity every time.

Out And About, Again

15 Ramadhan, 1444

It was around about this time in the fasting month last year that I found myself breaking the fast in company with some of my Muslim colleagues. I suppose something of a pattern has been set over the years: the early days of the month are spent routinely at home adjusting to a new (but old) way of doing things, and then I gradually open out to embracing others - growing (again) in awareness of the communal nature of this special (but general) experience.

Unlike last year, I arrived in good time to prepare to buka and it felt good to ease myself into the evening. And especially so since work had been particularly intense with little or no time to spit out (as Mum would have said.) Not that one is meant to spend time spitting in the Holy Month I hasten to add.

Striving

14 Ramadhan, 1444 

It's not so much the lack of food & drink that wears one down. It's the need to strive to be a better version of oneself. Not easy. Trust me, I know.

But, I suspect, not impossible.

Routine, Almost

13 Ramadhan, 1444 

Almost two weeks gone of the fasting month. And it's almost routine. Almost. But it never really is.

Case in point: I've been happily napping in the afternoon pretty much everyday - usually waking about an hour prior to breaking the fast. But today I was just too busy to even think of dozing for just five minutes. The odd thing was that it felt good to keep going and stay alert.

Even after years of observing the fast there's always something that surprises; sometimes something new; often something forgotten that comes alive again.

Exercising

12 Ramadhan, 1444

Am managing reasonably regular trips to the gym. I time these for just after breaking the fast and that seems to work for me, though I don't try and do too much with the weights.

I was a bit worried about how I would cope with fasting and working at the same time back at the start of the year, but I was still in recovery at that time. Now I'm doing it I'm feeling very good indeed, and intensely thankful for that. When colleagues inquire as to how I'm doing, and it's surprising just how often I'm asked this as a genuine, kind question, my reply is usually along the lines of never having felt better. I don't think people quite believe me, but the odd thing is that it happens to be true.

Giving

11 Ramadhan, 1444

13.40

A bit of jolt for me just now. I was in the NTUC supermarket at Clementi Mall, helping Noi at the checkout and browsing various favourite websites as I did so, when I came across a reference at Progressive Ears to the news of the death of the musician Ray Schulman, whom I'd referred to in this Far Place just yesterday evening (in glowing terms, I'm very happy to say.)

I generally try to avoid RIP-themed posts. There would be so many of them given that I'm of an age when the heroes of my youth, generally musicians, are finding their ways to their long homes. But it's good to reflect occasionally on how much of communal value an individual can give to the world when developing his or her talents to the full, as Mr Schulman undoubtedly, wonderfully, did.

22.40

And more bad news regarding the death of a co-worker, entirely unexpected, later in the day. Sad.

Spent the last three hours or so, just popping away to break the fast, at a carnival run by the students. And rightly jolly it was. Enough raw energy around to supply a large city for a day or two. Good to be among the living.

No Fooling

10 Ramadhan, 1444

Decided to give a spin to Gentle Giant's live Playing the Fool this morning and was glad I did. Doing so is turning into a bit of a tradition in this household as a way of celebrating this Great Day of Fools, but I'm a bit puzzled as to why I don't give it a listen more often. I was totally blown away by the stunning rendition of On Reflection, to the extent that I went searching for other versions posted to YouTube later in the day - hence the one in the link for the stunned enjoyment of all with ears. It's pure folly I don't open my ears to the genius of GG throughout the year.

Another foolish thing I must acknowledge today. We're exactly one-third of the way through the fasting month and I'm overly aware of that fact. Each year I do my best to lose myself in the experience of fasting, and each year I find myself counting down the days. Mind you, I suppose it doesn't help that each year I publish the dates for the month in this very Far Place. Doh!

(On a further note - having just watched and listened to the live rendition from the BBC's Sight & Sound In Concert I'm forced to ask whether Ray Schulman (bass, violin & vocals) in particular isn't just sickeningly over-blessed with talent? The answer is: no. His brilliance, and that of his erstwhile band-mates, is a source of absolute JOY.)