Not Forgetting

Another birthday for Maureen. Cheryl texted us to say that our card arrived safely at her house and she passed it to her mum to open it today. She seems to think that my sister will know who it's from and that in some sense she remembers me. Not sure she remembers Noi, though she was entirely comfortable with her the December we saw my sister last. 

It occurs to me that even as I strive to remember the many, many good years we had as brother and sister, there are things I would rather like to forget about the misery of the darker times. But that would be cowardly. Any life has its ups and downs, as Mum would have most likely said, and for Maureen to survive those downs and get through to the other side is, in its way, a small triumph.

Inconsequentiality

I was chatting with a colleague in the late afternoon, at that special hour that sees most teachers weary with woe in an affable kind of way - basically looking forward to packing our bags and setting off to homesweethome. Not sure why, but I asked him about a meeting he'd attended an hour or so back and he told me he hadn't actually been present for the duration as he was, essentially, inconsequential.

That struck me as pretty much the perfect state for anyone to aspire to in my line of work. Almost worth taking on board as a personal mission statement: To strive for inconsequentiality. 

Reading On

I'm a bit irritated at myself for not getting more sustained personal reading done. I have reasonable excuses - being close to overwhelmed on the work front; finding a lot of genuinely worthy stuff to read online + genuinely interesting podcasts to listen to relating to some key issues on my mind - but the fact remains that fundamentally I'm a reader of longer-form texts in old-fashioned hard-copy books and nothing should take priority over that variety of reading.

Most of all I really should have zoomed through Leila Aboulela's River Spirit, my current novel-on-the-go, because it's a fine and gripping work and spinning it out doesn't do justice to its impact & pace. Now halfway through and enjoying it immensely.

Intend to finish it by the weekend; and if I don't I have no excuses.

A Very Different Moment

Glancing back just now at what I was getting up to in August 2023 I was startled to hit upon a brief reference I made then to the Lucy Letby case; specifically to her sentencing for the murders of seven babies and the appalling malice involved in her deeds. Strange to think I've come to entirely change my mind over this. Indeed, from being extremely doubtful of her guilt in July I would now place myself in the 'convinced she's innocent' camp and feel certain that a major miscarriage of justice has taken place.

The change in my way of thinking on this has been very gradual, but the final pieces of the puzzle, as I perceived it, fell into place on watching again the 'Botched' series of films on YouTube put together by Guy Rowland. I'd viewed Part 1 and Part 2 in our sojourn in KL in June and been impressed by the many insights provided and the depth of analysis involved, but I'd not really put the whole critique of the investigation together since so many parts were involved. But watching again with a greater sense of the whole deeply sorry tale, followed by seeing Part 3 for the first time, having also listened to Mr Rowland in conversation with Christopher Morris, the guy who's written what I suspect might turn out to be the definitive book on the case, served to seal the deal on my certainty.

The thing is that it's only by accepting the young lady's innocence and the simple fact that there were no murders at all that all the parts make sense. And once you accept that, a deep anger over the extraordinary injustice involved takes over.

Bad News

It's sad to say this, but the news of Jason Arday's death can't have come as a complete surprise to anyone who's been following the story of the accusations made against him and the very public humiliation that followed. One of the disturbing features of the whole sorry saga was the sheer weight of the online pile-on that followed the breaking of the news and his subsequent resignation. I think it's a fair guess that this was a contributing factor to the breaking of the man. Even if you'd reached the conclusion that he was a fabulist on the grand scale - which I had - it was puzzling that so many online commentators seemed to think it was incumbent upon them to state the obvious without adding much in the way of insight, except for their own tiresome outrage.

I'd been thinking of posting something about the dangers of celebrity in relation to his story, particularly in relation to actively courting such celebrity, but this morning's news has put a stopper on any enthusiasm I felt for doing so. So I'll just state the obvious. If, like me, you've successfully hung on to being a complete non-entity for the span of your tenure in this world, be deeply thankful for what must be among the top five blessings of a good life. I'll certainly be keeping my head even lower behind whatever parapet I can find.

Oh, and I'd gently suggest that it's best to keep your outrage to yourself unless you're quite sure you have nothing to gain from unleashing it (especially in the way of 'views' and the like) and sharing it might just lead to some benefit for folks in general.

Falling Apart

For reasons best known to itself my trusty school laptop decided to fall apart just before I conducted a couple of online lessons this morning. It's a bit tricky to maintain one's cool when one's laptop screen is visibly breaking off from the body with the keyboard, but one sort of managed this as one delivered the necessary lessons. And then went into the necessary panic.

By an extraordinarily providential coincidence it was only yesterday that I'd booked an appointment with our ever-helpful IT guys to receive a brand new device as the not terribly trustworthy old trusty computer had been in my possession long enough to mean I deserved an upgrade. Unfortunately said appointment was several weeks ahead. Anyway, throwing caution to the wind I managed to charm one of our IT-support honchos into doing the swop in the afternoon, once I got back from prayers, on the grounds that by the end of the day I was likely not to be able to function as an IT-enabled sort of chap.

And the result of all this is that I'm happily typing these words on a rather spiffy brand-new laptop which has already drawn an admiring 'oooh' from The Missus. Which is all very well, but said device is missing all my old documents which for some reason didn't manage to transfer. So I'm manfully not panicking and trusting that the gods of IT know where they've gone and I'll get them back come Monday.

Positivity

Mulling over my brief thoughts on perfect moments from yesterday - in a precious few stolen moments today - made me consider the value of Positivity. And that consideration was further reinforced by a pleasant interlude this evening being in the audience for some of our students celebrating International Friendship Day. A reminder that in a world seemingly dominated by the short-sighted, narrow, grubby nationalisms espoused by those who wrap themselves in their flags, there are those who can genuinely celebrate their sense of identity whilst generously enjoying that of others.

Oh, and it's always nice to see kids dressing up and showing off.

Just Perfect

The world may be damaged, possibly irreparably, but once in a while our sorry species manages to create moments of perfection. Chanced across two today. First off, a stunning cover of the greatest pop song ever written. Gorgeous in its simplicity. And then an implausibly brilliant live version of one of the most sophisticated.

Maybe, just maybe, there's hope for us yet.

Even More Food For Thought

Last Friday I referred in passing to the controversy surrounding accusations made against Professor Jason Arday as Dom and I were discussing issues around equality & equity with our class. The story was sort of breaking then, and I've been trying to keep up with its developments, some of which have been bemusing to say the least. I've also made an attempt to acquaint myself with various points of view on the case, of which there are many, to put it mildly.

The story itself is quite extraordinary - material for a deeply satirical novel. And I'm not sure anyone is coming out of it well, except for those dogged souls doing their best to establish the facts that can be agreed on. But I will say, just for now, that I've long nurtured deep suspicions regarding the quality of work coming out of the academies around the world and what I'm hearing now prompts me to think my suspicions may have had considerable foundation.

Good To Go

08.05

After yesterday's happy sense of stasis - we never went beyond the grounds of the hotel - today will see us on the move again. First up, we'll be off to the engagement do in a couple of hours. It sounds like quite an elaborate affair, concerning which Fahmi briefed everyone yesterday evening, but I'll be very much an observer with little to do except look old and respectable and eat & drink well. I think I'll be able to manage most of that.

Then it's off again down the highway. Although tomorrow marks another welcome break from being physically at work, there's still lots to do. As there always is. Indeed, I'm getting on with some marking now, in addition to enjoying the morning calm here in Bangi. So, more anon, assuming I get the chance.

20.35

Had a jolly good time at Shibri's engagement, mingling happily and quaffing three tumblers of a piping hot teh tarik. And our journey down the highway was pretty smooth all told - slow-moving traffic now and again, but we sailed through the Immigrations on either side of the Tuas crossing. So now it's just a matter of enjoying a very relaxed Sunday evening, which is fine by me!