Hari Raya Puasa, Eid ul-Fitr; 1 Syawal, 1445
As with last year I attended the second session for Raya Prayers at Masjid Darussalam. The khutbah was in English and spoke deeply to me on Fostering a Confident and Resilient Religious Life. It's strange how what in another context might seem like cliches catch fire and come alive when you see how much they apply to whatever it is is real about one's own life.
As always and ever to all and everyone: Eid Mubarak!
29 Ramadhan, 1445
It slipped my mind completely yesterday that I'd intended to write something in relation to the fact that the date (western style) marked the anniversary of Mum's death. I suppose I have a reasonable excuse in the fact that it was a hyperbolically busy day, but reasonable excuses don't work for the kind of reasonable guilt I feel over the omission.
I've come to realise that, for me at least, the chief value of Ramadhan is the way it orients one towards others. Yes, the individual's fast is important, but in the great scheme of things it's the well-being of the whole community that counts. And one's generosity towards others is paramount.
When I think of my dead I think of what more I might have done for them. The answer, inevitably, is a lot.
28 Ramadhan, 1445
I'm afraid I've been counting down the days in a rather silly fashion over the last week: This is the last Monday I'll need to fast on; this is the last Sunday I'll need to fast on; etc... I do this at the end of every fasting month and it's always faintly embarrassing.
And here's the oddest thing. By the second day of Syawal, as always, I'll sit enjoying a cuppa in the canteen thinking how wonderful the freedom to drink is and part of me will regret the fact there will be no breaking of the fast at Maghrib, no small sense of triumph.
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The hardest thing about the Holy Month is keeping up with the demand to be better than oneself, or, just to be one's best self. A sort of dwindling from those moments of glimpsing a potential to transcend the self seems inevitable. And I suppose it is.
But the great thing is that it's enough just to achieve the fast, and that's simple, despite being hard.
Zakat paid. Twinkling lights up, and twinkling. Biscuits everywhere.
The month speeding (slowly) to its happy conclusion.
The heat continues. I think I'm bearing it with some fortitude. But The Missus is outdoing me on that front. Her output on the baking aspect of life this month has been nothing less than phenomenal. And she's now into her biscuiting phase - a sure marker for the last days of Ramadhan. See the rather splendid evidence above. And that's just a fraction of what's been created over the least few weeks.
24 Ramadhan, 1445
Back in January I stumbled upon an article in the Graun that I sort of wish I hadn't. Something similar today in the same publication caught my attention, but this time I'm happy it did. There's a faint promise of some sort of closure involved for those who suffered terribly in a massacre that took place just over one hundred years ago and, wonderfully, astonishingly, are still around for that promise to mean something real.
Just the photograph of Mother Randle and Mother Fletcher made me want to cheer.
22 Ramadhan, 1445
Gosh it's warm at the moment. Normally I'm no great fan of air-conditioning, but stepping into a cool space after spending time wrapped round by the humidity of the late-afternoon was definitely an experience to be welcomed. These are by no means the best conditions for fasting, yet in some ways they add to the experience. It isn't meant to be easy and, at this point in time I'm feeling distinctly uneasy with regard to coping with it all. So it sort of fits. Unfortunately.
21 Ramadhan, 1445
I suppose it should have been a day for foolery, but it wasn't. Some days just aren't funny, and this was one. This day was sober, serious and very, very dry. Partly because it was a day for holding fast. But I'm celebrating the fact that it wasn't by any stretch of the imagination a bad day. And that'll do nicely for me, thanks.
Oh, and I should add that I crashed spectacularly around 5.00 pm, for more than an hour. For such relief, even more thanks.
